Thursday, February 19, 2015

James Wisniewski Suspended for 8 Games because Crosby Punched Dubinsky

Dubinsky - Too Smart to Punch Crosby
Tonight, Brendan Shanahan, President of Hockey Operations for the Toronto Maple Leafs, announced he was suspending James Wisniewski for 8 games because Sidney Crosby punched Brandon Dubinsky.  Shanahan observed that Wisniewski was lucky that Dubinsky was too smart to punch Crosby, and that as a previous offender he deserved everything that Crosby had coming to him.  Besides, Shanahan observed, this move (suspending Wisniewski) has worked well for him in the past.

In trivial hockey news, not really significant to hockey pundits, was the fact that the Columbus Blue Jackets moved to 2-0 on the season series with their Metropolitan Division competitors, the Pittsburgh Penguins.  This was attributed to solar flares, and other inexplicable natural phenomenon, because everyone knows, including the fourth string announcers that NBC used for this game, that the Pittsburgh Penguins are a really great team, and ready to drive for a Stanley Cup any time, in spite of their interim general manager and coach.  The preceding statements do not apply to Blake Comeau, who is  a good dude and deserves everything he earns with Pittsburgh, and that we really could have used what he offers at a lot of times in this season, but I didn't really want to go there.

Meanwhile, Mrs Gallos observed that the Wisniewski gag was going to get really old at some point in time, that was rapidly approaching.  To which Gallos jauntily retorted that you can't make up stuff this stupid, and that history was my protector..... or something dumb like that.

GO JACKETS!!

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