|If you were a tree, prospective pro hockey coach, |
what kind of tree would YOU be?
While they were interviewing for the head coaching position (ultimately won by Scott Arniel), one of the questions the Columbus Blue Jackets asked each candidate was, "If you were a tree, what kind of tree would you be?"One can't let this rich vein go unmined, especially when the team is 2-11-1 and there is next to nothing worthwhile to report.
(Oh, I'm sorry. Jared Boll is back from injury and Jeff Carter is skating in practice. As I was saying...)
So let's have some fun. Howson interviewed five candidates for the head coaching job in the summer or 2010. They were:
- Claude Noel (the then-interim head coach, now Winnipeg coach)
- Paul MacLean (then-Detroit assistant, now Ottawa coach)
- Guy Boucher (then-AHL coach, now Tampa coach)
- Kevin Dineen (then-AHL coach, now Florida coach)
- Scott Arniel (then-AHL coach, now CBJ coach)
What do you think these guys said in response to that question?
Permit me to take a stab at hypothetical answers. All in jest, of course.
Dineen was portrayed as an old time hockey guy. I bet he listened to that question and said, "WTF type of question is that?" And, with that answer, he bombed his first interview.
Noel came across as pretty much willing to do whatever it took to keep the job that he held by a thread. So I bet he said something like, "What do you want it to be, Scott? Just tell me..."
Boucher was the motivational guy, so his seems pretty easy. "What tree motivates you, Scott? Now see that tree in your head. BE THAT TREE."
MacLean, the long-time assistant who was desperate for a club of his own, could have come up with something like, "Maple. It's the symbol of Canada, home of hockey. You like that? Trees..hockey..tied it all together. Babcock liked that clever stuff."
Arniel, of course, had to play the exotic card for, as we've learned, he employs a scheme that works on the out-there premise that defense is strictly optional in today's National Hockey League. I bet he said, "Birch," and then engaged in a staredown with Howson. HIRED!
OK, troops, don't let me down. Take my poor attempts at humor and one-up me.
The microphone is open. Have it it. What do you think these five coaching candidates said?